Status: Damaged

USB Mjollnir


One day SCUL pilot Destiny's Child, then working with Skunk at Seven Cycles, said casually, "you should build a Raleigh Chopper out of titanium - it's all straight tubes, it'd be so easy!" CURSE YOU DESTINY'S CHILD!!!

Seriously, it was waaay more work than Skunk thought it would be. First of all scrap titanium tubes don't come as long as they are needed, even to make a little bike like Mjollnir. So Skunk welded short tubes together and sanded down the seams - if you feel with your fingers you can find them. Secondly, since the chainstays are super short and the tire is wide, 7/8" tubing doesn't easily snake its way around without chunks removed. The head tube is made from thicker stock on the top and bottom and the middle of the head tube is much thinner and is welded together. The bars and the fork had to be custom made too. At the last second Skunk thought it would be a good idea to change the shape of the handlebars so the grips would point down - this makes for a not-so-ideal riding position.

Note the reflective black decals and the secret bottle opener on the fork, which will completely spray you with beer if you don't know how to do it right.

Mjollnir has been described as "a racing bike to fit a chimpanzee', but in fact it wasn't really designed much at all. However we're pretty certain this is the world's second only titanium chopper, and has over 3,000 light years logged in official SCUL missions, holding at number three in rank at the time of this summary update. USB Mjollnir won best custom at Lars Anderson in 1999, but we don't care, we're just information pack-rats.

Specifications

ClassDestroyer
ConfigurationFighter
Missions256
Light Years3972.341
Thrust Rating6.5
Handling Rating4.5
Difficulty Rating5.5
Max Warp1

Construction Data

Hull MaterialTitanium
Hull TypeTitanium Scrap
Chief EngineerFleet Admiral Skunk
BuilderFleet Admiral Skunk
WelderFleet Admiral Skunk
Originthe titanium scrap bins of Seven
Christened on990813
LocationFort Tyler
Navi Retro
Primary RetroCoaster

Missions

StardateMissionPilot
190727   Reindeer Games Precision
190720   Scul! The Boot Camp Ziqqurat
190406   Appalachiamission '19 Tyrian
181013   Alien Egg Investigation Ravensson
181006   Skunk Day: Episode 500 - A New Hope TurboHoney
180929   Super Easy Double Century (1:64 scale version) Ravensson
180915   Cats In Space Ravensson
180818   Chalk-Full-O'Funk Raine
180811   Lazer Mizzzion Sir Sartorius
180728   Ancient Alien Ruins Ravensson
180714   Flight of the Aviator Antlers
180707   Planetary Prom Night Ravensson
180616   Double Dippin' Eyyou
180519   Soggy Ninjas Wombat
180512   Persephone Calling Ravensson
180505   A.R.T.S.O.S. Antlers
180428   ABC It's as Easy as Objectives 1 2 3 TUFF N TINY
180421   Wandering Cricket Epsilon
180407   Alohamission 2018 Epsilon
171104   Life Day 2017 Eyyou
170916   Meskenas Mischief Huckleberry
170826   By The Book perilous
170805   Siren Song Snow
170722   Chop To The Hop Wombat
170617   Luna XII-Undecim Cakes
170610   Cave-In Tartheis
170527   Augment My Chopper Civitron
170520   Eggscape To Poo Island YoMomma
170506   Wheeled Migration Epoxy
170415   Egg-zaduration Dare
170408   Z Axis Dregs
170401   I'm Dreaming of a White Alphamission Leotard
161008   Skunk Day '16 Dare
160917   Peter Pan - Return of the Lost Boys Osprey
160903   U-Want To Do What? Epoxy
160820   Ghost Train Epoxy
160814   Dawn Patrol Tartheis
160806   A View To A Thrill Wombat
160618   Luna Libros IV: Satellites of Love Leotard
160611   Over, Under, Around, and Through Proteus
160604   Twentieth Anniversary Fox Raleigh Stripe
160514   Do The Worm Wombat
160416   The Friendly Skies Hezmek
160402   Alfrescomission '16 Snow
151107   Omegamission 2015 Rocket
151031   Hallowheels 2015 Snow
151024   Back to the Castle Snow
151017   Warm Fuzzies Snow
151010   Illuminus Zenith
150926   Where's The Beef? Zenith
150919   Bog Standard Ops Zenith
150905   'Real' Chopper Gang Milkrun Epoxy
150815   Cosmic Safari Zenith
150801   Newton Horizons Taco
150718   Hot Shot Zenith
150704   Spindependence Amethyst
150613   Keeping up ApPEARances Dump Truck
150606   Hey Nineteen: SCUL Day 2015 Cortana
150516   Show and Tell Deadblow
150502   String Theory Dare
150425   Chop Your Own Adventure Manco
150418   Cloaked in Cardboard Deadblow
150411   Ellipsoidal Oviform Search and Rescue Deadblow
150404   Alfalfa Mission '15 Zenith
141108   Overtime: Omegamission '14 Zenith
141101   Halloweeeels '14 Deadblow
141025   Winter? SCULimpics '14 Cortana
141018   Steam Release Zenith
141012   Chonk! Zenith
141011   This Mission Brought To You By The Letter 'D' Deadblow
141004   Skunk Day '14: Spring Forward, Fall Back Zenith
140927   Catch-22 Zenith
140913   Cursed But Not Doomed DrClaw
140906   Radiation Worship Cortana
140823   Aquaprincess Deadblow
140816   Let's Get Physical Deadblow
140802   Leave It To Chance Deadblow
140712   Into The Grid Epoxy
140621   Operation Summer-ville Hambone
140614   Barely Legal Tyrian
140531   All Aboard the SCUL Express! Dead Bride
140510   Rhubarb Memorial Treekiller
140503   Safety Dance Mongoose
140405   Alphonsemission '14 DreadFlint
131102   Omegamission 2013 Epoxy
131019   Pen-Penultimate Mission Epoxy
130921   Night of the Flying Maggots Epoxy
130907   Back 2 SCUL Funkenstein
130817   Buzz Kill Cobb
130810   Low Places, Tight Spaces, Permagrin Faces Epoxy
130803   Dollar A Pound metoikos
130727   SCULimpics 2013 metoikos
130713   Stifie's Chooper Gang Wombat
130629   Radiation Warz!!! Epoxy
130622   Super Mooning: The Revenge Epoxy
130601   Sweet Seventeen Epoxy
130511   Shake Your Bones DrClaw
121103   Novemberiffic Omegamission metoikos
121027   Hallowheels 2012 DrClaw
121020   Picture Day Disco Digital Snapshot Funtime Extreme metoikos
121013   Bring Them Home metoikos
121006   Skunk Day 2012 metoikos
120929   Chasing The Stars With The Starchasers metoikos
120908   Spokesfest Civilian Escort metoikos
120901   Night of the Living U-Hauls metoikos
120825   For Tinman DrClaw
120818   Flight of the Bumblebee metoikos
120811   Shabadoonicorn metoikos
120728   Poseidon's Pimple metoikos
120721   Orange You Glad It's Pecan Day? metoikos
120630   One Wet Pilot metoikos
120623   Chopra vs. Godzilla Sage
120519   Disco Diva Dance Party Civitron
120428   Voyage to Arkham metoikos
120421   Tea and Grackle bitwise
111029   I'm Dreaming of a White Hallowheels DrClaw
111002   HONK! Parade DrClaw
111001   Medley Mission parmesan
110924   Longrange Badass Rendezvous metoikos
110917   Weird Bumps Civitron
110910   À la seconde metoikos
110813   Tyler Perry Presents Mary Tyler Moore In 'Fort ... DrClaw
110716   Bach in the USSR (boretum) eXceSs
110702   Wild Goose Chase metoikos
110625   Turn It Up metoikos
110618   Skywriter Wombat
110611   Ships at Sea metoikos
110521   So Long And Thanks For All The Ι&#... metoikos
110430   Let Them Eat Cake Civitron
110423   Shelter From The Storm metoikos
110416   To The Finish Seven Of Nine
110409   Repo Men Seven Of Nine
101023   Shiny Metals ZyGoat
100717   OMGPWNIES SayAgain
100710   Heavy Nebula Immersion Mao
100703   Exquisite Corpsicle Sadie Blake
100417   From the Death Star(t) to the Finish Treekiller
100410   Blue Angels in a Ho-down Treekiller
100402   Alpha-haha-mission 2010 Treekiller
091003   Show the Admiral a Good Time - Skunk Day 2009 Treekiller
090822   Nitrogen Poop Monkey Skidmark
090718   Peeecamatic: Pechanical Yarko
090627   Fallen Heroes Sunshine
090502   Art Like a Fart Booty Call
090425   Space, the Final Funtier peacefrog
090404   Aplhamission snarly
081025   Radiation Schmadiation Evil Twin
081018   Downtown ld50
080913   Mony Mony (ride ChromePony) Thalo
080906   The Pilots of Wetzpance (or The S stands for Su... Booty Call
080830   13 Circles of Hell, Are We There Yet? ld50
080705   Waltor Day Carnival steerpike
080628   S'more In Store Kamikaze
080607   SCUL Day 2008 Zilch
080531   Starship Safari Jacknife
080510   Mixtape UglySac
080426   Merit Badge UglySac
080419   Don't Tell Megaseth it's MegaSeth Day Zilch
080412   Get Everyone Lathed UglySac
080405   AlphaMissle 08 Friend
071027   Omegamission geekhouse
071013   This Little Piggie Cried OW!!! entropy
071006   Skunk Day Honkfest MeltDown
070701   Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! Axeman
070526   Rotwang Day dillweed
070414   Suburban White Boy Lament [MegaSeth Day] Appleseed
070407   ALPHA 007 Mosquito
060916   Big Trouble In Little China Secret Chief
060902   Forced Acceptance Mosquito
060826   Freshmaker Bitzer
060812   eXtremo™ Nameless Day, 2006 snarly
060805   Swing Set (Diva Day) Meatball Mulligan
060527   Keep On Truckin (Rotwang Day) Zappa
051001   OctoberTest Mosquito
050924   Isla Castilia Chops
050917   Rain Rain Go Away Schemey
050910   Moose Day Celebrated Chops
050903   Somethin or other Lord Manwhore
050826   Operation Super Posi Oppo
050820   Egg Toss Mental Simon
050813   No NoWay Day Evil Twin
050716   Post SCULimpics Oppo
050709   One Bike To Rule Them All Oppo
050702   WalTor Day (2005) Oppo
050618   DiscoInferno (VomitDay 2005) Schemey
050611   Hot and Moist Oppo
050604   SCUL Day 2005 AceHole
050528   Full Metal Jackets (R0twang Day) Kaibosch
050521   No Plan Oppo
050514   Stoodio53 Oppo
050423   Radiation Overload snarly
050416   Mega Seth a liscous Buttercup
050409   Beta Missssion 05 Oppo
050402   Aplamission 05 Oppo
041023   Recurse The 'Verse Drunkle
041016   Jump Start Fox Glove
040925   Axis of Elvis AceHole
040918   Broken Pickle Oppo
040807   Booty Camp RoadRash
040724   Naked Keg Party Biker Mom
040710   Chop-In Theater (Waltor Day) Appleseed
040703   Poisoning Pigeons In The Park? Oppo
040619   I Dunno (vomit day) Oppo
040612   Studio 53 Disestablis Mentarianism
040605   SCUL Day 2004 (Abandon All Clothes) Blipblipbeep
040529   Wherever The Wind Blows Blipblipbeep
040522   Howdy Partner (Rotwang Day) Vegetable
040515   Opertation Shoulda Turned Left At Albuquerque Blipblipbeep
040508   Derby Durby Derbie snarly
040424   Oppo Oppo snarly
040417   Stop N Chop Blipblipbeep
040410   Beta Ride Oppo
040403   Alphamission 04 Shakes
031101   Hallowheels 03 Mosquito
031025   As Seen On TV Zappa
031018   Tour De Ville Monkeyboy
031011   Pump Up The Volume Mosquito
031004   Skunk Day 03 Mosquito
030927   SCULimpics 2003 snarly
030920   Arbor Mayhem Krank
030906   Breaking Headlines Nosepicker
030816   NoWay Day A-OK Zappa
030809   Large Melon Shoelace
030802   Storm The Castle snarly
030726   Two Miles Per Hour Hazard
030719   Inmates Run The Asylum Vegetable
030712   Happy Fun Times Bike Club Shakes
030614   Double Distress Call Mountain Grown
030524   The Best Little Warehouse In Fenway Hazard
030510   Get Outta Town LoJack
030503   Back In The Saddle Trackstar
021026   Last Dance Monkeyboy
021012   Radiation Control Pikachu
021005   Skunk Day Observed Fatso
020928   SCULimpics 2002 Monkeyboy
020921   Massive Entropy Denial Monkeyboy
020914   Stickem Up Monkeyboy
020810   Castle Island Big Banana
010624   Square Ride CommVic
010609   Moon Over Aborertum Shakes
010602   Mmmm... Ice Cream LoJack
001014   Moon Over Arboretum Gargoyle
001009   SCULimpics Night Games 20 Soul Sucka
000924   Where The Wind Blows Smash
000819   Two Hundred Scale Miles Per Hour MegaTron
000806   Mindy Milky Bunny
000520   19 Pilots Crazy Dan
000506   Wake Up The Dead Nowhere
000401   April Fools Trouble
991024   Drunken Colony Attack Mucus
990925   Silver Scream The Chef
990911   Quadraflat Scratch
990905   Treasure Hunt PitGirl
990902   Level E - 9.2.99 Scratch
990829   Blunt Facial Trauma Mucus
990813   Mark McGee's Going Away Party Fleet Admiral Skunk