Cats In Space
They say space travel can be like herding cats. Well never was that so true in the history of space travel as was this Saturnight's mission. If you've never seen a lineup of cats in space suits, let me tell you, it is highly LOL worthy. Just to make things more interesting, a couple of kate and katinas were brought in from the far away universe of Lithuania. We assume they were jettisoned from a passing cargo ship. When your engine starts growing kittens, well there isn't much else to be done. The universe is cruel. But they found their way to snuggle into the cockpits of a few spare ships with the help of Baaaaaane Thunder Cat and Lord McFluffers. We were joined too by a newborn mewling dubbed Snake Paw, who showed up when Fleet Admiral Pepe Le Pew shook a box of treats in an attempt to bring all the cats to the fort. Only Snake Paw answered the call. On the plus side, we're now fairly secure in the knowledge that there are no more strays in the Artisans Space Station.
Out on the launchpad Lordmcfluffers introduced his new ship, The Mighty Cat o Nein Tails, code named German Steel. At Mcfluffers' request, the official cat of Germany, Mr. Scissors, christened it with a nice wet hairball right on the cockpit. Admiral Pepe hissed a final decree, "A cat always moves aside during incoming - make the fleet proud tonight!"
Lordmcfluffers led the way, as Neko-Goku perched atop Iridium, to be closer to the birds. Tardar Sauce rode upon Trinity, costumed as a white persian snowball, to let all of space know the cats were on the move. Cats love small enclosed spaces, so we were naturally drawn to the nostril tunnels, and after some playful darting around the fleet turned to swing back towards the Union Constellation, when RadRex took a tumble, but after unwinding the brake yarn around her helm, we were in good shape until another mechanical, Neko-Goku also had yarn problems, this time with the propulsion transfer conduit string.
Undeterred, we kept the herd moving, through the back streets and alleyways of Harvard, until we reached the Central Constellation. Bane Thunder Cat and Captain Profligacy began meowing dramatically all the way from the back of the clowder, begging Lordmcfluffers to stop for treats. While we were stopped, CatSproximity found a spot under a ship to take a nap, and Raven-noms chased a bird up on top of a lamp post fixture in front of the library, and stayed there as he was afraid to climb back down. Mr. Scissors, inspired by Womcat, got himself a good ol' American Slurpee, and Bane Thunder Cat played with catnip mice on the helm of El Gato. Admiral Kitty Pants invited everyone in the clutter to indulge in unsavory snacks from afar. Not to be outdone, Tardar Sauce waggled some Swedish Fish, and ShadowCat gladly took the bait.
In Central, Raven-noms took a spill on Mewllnir. The kittens ran through the byways of the MIT star, chasing the laser lights of Cloudbustpurrr and Snowball, and Tardar Sauce took a nap under a blanket, while the glaring used the litter box.
Under the North Point Park we tied pink bows on the kittens' necks, and they ran around chasing after the ribbons. In the end ShadowCat had shredded everyone else's ribbons to bits! It was adorable. Dr. Claw and Captain Profligacy catcalled back and forth as Tardar Sauce strutted along the top of a fence, until she was backed into a corner and forced to give all her Swedish fish to Bane Thunder Cat, CatSproximity and ShadowCat, to distract them long enough to make her escape from the unruly alley cats.
Well, after chasing these cats through space it was time to get them all home safe to bed. Saucers of milk called. As often is the case with herding cats, the mission was a complete failure, but this old space-cowboy can't stay angry at a ship shape pounce like this for long. I'll never forget the time I flew those little pink noses into space, and my upholstery won't soon allow me to.