Unbirthday: A Mad Tea Party
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!

Chapter 1: Down the Worm Hole
At Fort Tyler, pilots were sleepily bumbling about, tinkering with the various bits and bobs of their fantastical ships, when all of a sudden a Mad Rabbit appeared. This is nothing particularly remarkable, thought the pilots, but when the rabbit stopped to read the Misson Control display, and was heard to mutter “Oh Dear! Oh Dear! We shall be late for launch!” pilots began to burn with curiosity. In a flash they were off to the launch pad where mission leader Couscous briefed the fleet on their objectives for the evening. A motley bunch, there were rabbits, dormice, Queens of the Red and White variety, and appearances by Cheshire Shadowcat along with CatMax. All pilots wore their best funny hats, including Dr Claw in his guise as an Icelandic cheeseburger. It was high time to go, so the fleet made haste to depart, with much flapping and ringing and blinking.

At the front of this spectacle was the Pastry Queen of Hearts, who navigated on an unusual chariot bedecked with a cymbal, its periodic clashes serving to herald the fleet’s arrival as they made their way through the Cambridge system.

Chapter 2: A Mad Tea Party
Presently, the group came upon a glorious garden, filled with an extraordinary series of topiary bushes, and they set about arranging picnic blankets and tea sets in preparation for an Unbirthday party. A vast array of cakes, tarts, finger sandwiches, and comfits appeared, and Couscous busied himself preparing the hot water for tea while others capered about, stuffing their faces with treats. Cheshire ShadowCat climbed gracefully into a tree and grinned down at Framerate, who was absorbed in piling hats onto their head until there was a wobbly stack of at least 6.

When pilots were thoroughly sated, it was time for a recitation.

Twas funky, and the HARVy droves,
Did blink and blibble in the warp,
All plinky were the greeble ploves,
And the mooble floozle florp.

“Beware the Fuzzywock, my son!
Its shorts all eaten, shirt astray
Beware the shiny, pointy one
As it teeters o’er the fray


This went on somewhat further, though the subsequent verses are hazy.

Chapter 3: Do you play croquet?
Reaching her regal hand into one of the many cargo bays of JVH Trinity, the White Queen produced a colony of plump flamingoes, and a handy spherical hedgehog was scrounged up at the last minute. Pilots scrambled around to form wickets, with the more acrobatic among them forming a large super-wicket to the amusement of the onlookers. An errant duck decided to come investigate further, but decided against joining the game. At last it was time to depart.

Chapter 4: The Caucus-race
It was a rather odd-looking and slightly bedraggled party that alighted at the other end of the wormhole, where Couscous prepared for a caucus-race. What IS a caucus-race, thought many pilots, but soon everyone was flitting around this way and that, some on foot and some on ships. Antlers marked out some arrows on the course path, which racers joyfully followed and ignored in turns. Soon the prizegiving was announced and everyone received comfits.

Chapter 5: The end
Eventually the Pastry Queen of Hearts resumed navigational duties and shepherded the whole ragtag bunch back over the asteroid belt and home to base. A dreamy haze descended on the pilots as they put their ships away, with many left thinking to themselves Oh, I’ve had such a curious dream….
Pilot Ship Points Promotion
Antlers Pale Horse 0  
Bacchus Yer Mom 166.909   Recruit
BaneThunderwolf Bieber Fever 359.522  
Commander Rhubarb Dr. Love 72.323   Recruit
couscous Glittergasm 372.511   Master Chief Petty Officer
Dead Bride Mad Rabbit 297.285  
dogi Freedom 145.274   Senior Chief Petty Officer
DrClaw Skywarp 133.257  
Everest Lust 375.298   Ensign
Fleet Admiral Skunk Cloudbuster 215.436  
Framerate Centvrion 0  
Kongzilla Swamp Thing 0   Recruit
Leotard Trinity 313.013   Rear Admiral, Upper Half
Lordmcfuzz Eat My Shorts! 295.724  
MsMoon Strangelove (Bombardier) 62.0423  
Pastry Queen Everclashing Gobstopper 452.061  
RadMax Suspension of Disbelief 138.895  
Shadowcat Mousetrap 354.599  
Sidekick Star Hustler (Bombardier) 138.764  
Snow Deep Blue Dream 264.022   Petty Officer 1st Class
Tanager Spooky Pirate 0  
Threespeed Strangelove 149.734  
Tyrian Compliance 195.436  
Wombat Star Hustler 167.192  
Mission Task Pilot
Airlock Shadowcat
Chalk Bag Antlers
Cleaner Red Squirrel
Compressor Wrangler Red Squirrel
ComSat Monkey Threespeed
Comsat Monkey Partner 1 BaneThunderwolf
Damage Control Leotard
Deck Officer Snow
Deck Officer Asst. Everest
Flat Bag Pastry Queen
Food Wrangler Antlers
Medi Bag Lordmcfuzz
Minister of Zoobs BaneThunderwolf
Mission Leader couscous
Mission Pinner Everest
Mission Reporter Dead Bride
Navigator Pastry Queen
RadioBox A Fleet Admiral Skunk
Radiobox B DrClaw
RadioBox C Leotard
Recycler Dead Bride
Skynet Operator (post-mission) BaneThunderwolf
Stellar Cartographer Pastry Queen
Sticker Bag Tyrian
Still Cam Tanager
Tailgunner Snow
Tool Bag Bacchus
Wookiee Bag Leotard
Division: MAD
Date: 08/19/2017
Status: Success 
Origin: Fort Tyler
Destination: A mad tea party to celebrate our unbirthdays
Light Years: 8.3009
G-Well Activity: 0.89
Technical Rating: 0.89