Operation
Divinity Cat Moved Us To The Moon
15 pilots arrived on the launch pad with those dang blue civi ships and Lordmcfuzz crawled up to the launch pad with Cloudbuster. Shadowcat rallied the 7 pilots and gave a speech. It was a long drawn out speech about moving or something. I think a pilot disintegrated during bag roll car, and the dust pile blew away into the wind.

The fleet finally left the basement of Yer Mom, winding through narrow hallways and up the handicap ramp. We had to take apart Cloudbuster to get it through the door as the landing gear was just too wide for the frame. It was a whole process but it had to be done. Sadly there was a transport blocking our We-Haul so that was a funky bust. Who was "no parking" sign poster again? They should not get any points for this mission.

Dr.Claw navigated the mission from the rear as Tanager took the orders barked up in the front. She docked everyone points for falling behind her at every turn. Every starboard call Dr.Claw made, Tanager went port, and the port command ended up being an ease-up, and no turn was ever made. But that was not much of a problem because of the old saying "Three Ports makes a Company Halt".

Winding through the library rows, the fleet picked out their books and begged the mission leader Shadowcat to read to them. Every pilot was allowed to check out two books and sit on the street map rug. The Cat of Light started to sing us a story. It was magical and somewhat demonic.

Then there was call out for shore leave just as a wild Klingon, Jake Sisco, rolled up the looking for some grumbah. We pulled out one of our bags and it made him happy. We asked if we could join his night ride but he declined and followed us on and off for a little while. He was a little discobobulated with Yer Mom and her discoball. Lordmcfuzz felt that Cloudbuster was working too hard while carrying him up a negi g-well so he set Cloudbuster down for a nap, and took one himself. The rest of the fleet was unphased while waiting at a red pulsar.

Wombat then led the fleet to the Canyon. It was a series of switch backs and all we could smell was the sweet, sweet burning of salmon retro pads. By the time we got to the bottom, the salmon was just a little over cooked but no one cared, except Leotard thought the bones were too dull as she poked her finger. It did not even draw any blood. Silfer thought the canyon shook too much and jumped into the water for a swim. They floated away, never to be seen again, until they floated back around, sort of like those lazy rivers at those fancy water parks.

It was getting so late, so the fleet phased through the canyon walls back into the Somerville universe. The Claw that Doctors used to fish out the little green minions picked out the bird lady and showed her the most direct way back to the fort. The feathered person decided to keep that to themselves so the fleet got lost and traveled about 40 light years before realizing that they were lost, then it took them 16 parsecs to get back onto course. there was a blue hole somewhere in there somewhere, but the time dilation was too much to really record what color it really was and if it was a hole or a hill. Come to think about it, it was definitely a hill.

Only Jake Crisco made it back to fort. He said it looked like a dump and will never tell the story of his experience with the Flying Donuts to anyone. No one will hear how the swimming salt water taffies burned down the fort, or how they got lost and were never found again. All those brave brewers, lost to the sands of gravity, will be loved and held forever by the enemy of the small people. There were exactly 10 of them, on vibrating space ships. All of them out of zoobs and full of lead dust, the glass kind.

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All of that never happened. Actually that is a lie too. Lordmcfuzz did put Cloudbuster down for a nap, a cat nap.
Pilot Ship Points Promotion
DrClaw Skywarp 708.993   Rear Admiral, Lower Half
Leotard Yer Mom 229.5  
Lordmcfuzz Cloudbuster 712.1  
Shadowcat Ez Raider 1040.98   Lieutenant, Junior Grade
Silfr Hrimfaxi 179.5   Petty Officer 2nd Class
Tanager Paprika 696.483   Lieutenant Commander
Mission Task Pilot
Airlock DrClaw
Chalk Bag Tanager
Cleaner Tanager
Compressor Wrangler Lordmcfuzz
ComSat Monkey Shadowcat
Damage Control Shadowcat
Deck Officer Lordmcfuzz
Flat Bag Leotard
Food Wrangler DrClaw
Life Support Synthesis Tanager
Medi Bag DrClaw
Minister of Zoobs Lordmcfuzz
Mission Leader Shadowcat
Mission Pinner Shadowcat
Mission Reporter Lordmcfuzz
MRC Officer Shadowcat
Navigator DrClaw
RadioBox A Lordmcfuzz
Skynet Operator (post-mission) Lordmcfuzz
Stellar Cartographer DrClaw
Sticker Bag Tanager
Still Cam Tanager
Tailgunner Tanager
Tool Bag Shadowcat
Wookiee Bag DrClaw
Division: MAD
Date: 09/01/2018
Status: Success 
Origin: Yer Mom
Destination: Out of her basement
Light Years: 16
G-Well Activity: 2.4
Technical Rating: 1.5